Love in Bed, Not in the Head

That was what Ted was getting from Penelope. Or maybe it would be more accurate to say that was what Penelope was getting from Ted.
Is it really fair to dissect their relationship at this point? It isn’t even a relationship, and it never will be one. But right now, they were getting out of bed. They were courteous with each other but they didn’t give any other signs of affection during the morning after. Neither was unhappy about almost pretending their last night didn’t happen.
How did each feel about the other’s performance?
Ted’s Rating (as given by Penelope): 4 out of 10
Penelope’s Rating (Ted’s opinion): 7 out of 10
Originally, these two were more than happy to divulge specific comments about the experience, but due to “censorship of taste,” our editors do not wish to see the lurid details in print. All we could say to better explain this distance of pleasure is this: Penelope had slept with four times as many people as Ted. No matter that Penelope lost her virginity to her husband, and never cheated once on him. Let’s be honest: after his death she didn’t ever want to stop having enormous amounts of sex with pretty much any guy she met. Her only requirements were this: so long as he didn’t treat her poorly, so long as he didn’t smell or look too bad, so long as he didn’t infect her with a disease...Some might have said that Ted passed all those tests with flying colors and some might have save said that Ted was an utter misfit in those fields. But that didn’t change the fact that he succeeded in Penelope’s eyes, even if he didn’t take her to any place she couldn’t take herself on a more boring night. Ted was comparatively inexperienced, so he had an excuse.