Preparation

This is the recipe that Ted wrote out the previous day while communing with Satan:
1) Soil.
2) Ink.
3) Alcohol.
4) Pomegranate juice.
5) Evergreen pine needles.
6) Barbara’s blood.
As Ted went outside to excavate a handful of soil, he thought the devil had given him a very generic recipe. He wondered whether it was really going to work or not. He didn’t doubt that he could get the concoction into Luther’s drink. He doubted if Luther would notice in a way so as not to blame Ted.
He went back upstairs and took out a glass. He dropped a negligible amount of dirt on the bottom. He went beneath his kitchen sink and he took out a bottle of rubbing alcohol and he poured another tiny bit on top of the dirt. Then he went into his bedroom and took out a cheap pen and scissors. He cut the pen in half, and he dropped some of the ink in the glass.
He went to the store and he bought pomegranate juice. And then he walked to the park and found an evergreen tree and grabbed and pulled off one of its tendrils. He went home and he poured a little bit of the juice in the glass, and dropped a few pine needles in as well. He called up Barbara and told her he needed her to donate some of her blood. An hour later they were sitting on the floor of Ted’s apartment, five candles around them lit, smoking a bowl, listening to classical music.
“Okay, here you go,” Ted said, putting the glass next to them and handing Barbara a sewing needle.
“Has anyone ever told you you’re a psycho?” she asked in jest.
“No, nobody has ever told me I am a psycho,” he replied
She pricked her finger. She held it over the glass, but it continued to run down the contours of her skin.
“You have to squeeze it over the glass,” Ted said, “Like an orange.”
Barbara squeezed her finger until a droplet of blood splashed down in the miniscule liquid. “That’s it,” she said, “I’m not making any more blood juice.”
“That should do it, if Satan abides,” Ted said.
“Are you for real, with all of this stuff about the devil? Because it’s really starting to get kind of creepy.”
“It’s Halloween; do you want me to start acting all normal?” “No,” she said, reaching for the bowl on the floor also beside them “I just don’t like talking about this stuff so seriously.”
“The seriousness of it is what makes it fun,” Ted said, “You may think I’m a kook, but you still want to see if there’s anything to this potion or not, right?”
“I guess I just signed on when I pricked my finger,” Barbara said, igniting the lighter.