Smears Across a Windshield

Bugs were flying across Jeanne’s windshield. The air was humid, rain was beginning to fall, and it was now dark. Jeanne turned her windshield wipers on, and the bugs smeared across the glass, the rain lubricating their demises. Jeanne was smoking a cigarette as she drove, and Missy was smoking a cigarette as she rode.
Missy started off, “So you wanted to know how you could be normal?”
Jeanne flicked her cigarette out the window. “Yeah. If I’m so special then how come nobody else recognizes that? Individuality is bullshit. The more individual you are, the less likely you are to meet anybody who can stand you for even a second.”
“Well, you just have to emphasize your most special quality.”
“See, that’s what I’m talking about.”
“What?”
“That bullshit positive attitude about things. Some people, like you, are just born with it, you know. You just have this instinctual grasp on the world, like you know what you’re supposed to do all the time. Some people, like me, can’t just turn themselves on or off, we just are.”
“You lost me there for a second. I think you’re overthinking this. Let me get this straight: because you aren’t getting anything out of it, you’re going to give up everything that makes you special in favor of “normalizing” yourself in order to, at the bottom of it, have more successful relationships with guys.”
“Well, that is one part of it. But the other part of it is, people in general just don’t really care about what you do for your hobbies, or what you’d want to write to your senator about, or what films you really like. They just want the facts. They want the information they need, and nothing more. There’s no more room for things that actually mean anything to you personally to pop up in small talk conversations throughout the day.”
“So, because they don’t care, you’re going to just stop airing these opinions?”
“Yeah, what’s the use, I can think of better things to say. People respond better when you ask them what they would do, not when you tell them what you think and, by extension, what they should think.”
“You know Jeanne, I think you might just benefit from a good night of drinking.”